I love having lunch with the preschoolers. I love their little guts so much, it’s not even funny. They have these toothy grins and live in a world with much more magic and reality than the adult world. No wonder the Christ Jesus invited them to him.

One day last week, I was hiding in the kitchen eating lunch, chatting (ok, mostly listening) with co-workers when D, the cook, comes in and says, “Miss Kate, you’re wanted out there.” “Me? Really? Why?” (Not sure why I asked these questions because preschoolers aren’t big on giving logical explanations why they want something and maybe, just maybe, I was totally freaking flattered that these kids wanted – as Miss Piggy might say – moi.)

I sit down at my usual table and there is little A, the sweetest little boy. He only drinks chocolate milk and eats chicken nuggets, and then only if he believes they came from McDonalds. He’s got these chocolatey brown eyes that shine with such seriousness and passion, and no front teeth. When A talks or smiles, it’s all gums. He and the other littles kept saying “Boo!” and playing peek-a-boo with me. I encouraged it, which probably is not what the preschool teachers wanted, but it was my lunch break and I wanted to engage these little munchkins who wanted moi. As I jumped back in utter fear at their scary boo faces, little A says, “Miss Kate are you scared?!” Of course I am, I told him – he’s using his big BOO! “Miss Kate,” he replied, “scared isn’t a real thing!!” His eyes were bright and I could see how deeply he meant it. I hate when adults don’t take little kids seriously, because little kids feel and believe things on deep levels. A seriously believed scared wasn’t a real thing and he absolutely, positively needed me to know this. Out of the mouths of babes.

Scared isn’t a real thing! This has come to me at least 5 times a day since he said it. What wisdom; I hope and pray that life doesn’t knock it out of him, but I’m sure it will…he’ll believe things are scary that aren’t, just because someone, some great “they” told him so. But he’s right. Scared isn’t a real thing; at least, it doesn’t have to be. I’m not gonna feed you some cheesy line about how things aren’t scary with “real” faith in God, because that’s not true or even possible. But what A said has truth for many of our greatest fears: being alone, being in silence, being vulnerable, being open, being contemplative, being active, being our truest of true selves.

I’ve long had a book on contemplative prayer, one that gradually leads you into learning to BE with and in God. I’ve started and stopped a few times, like I have with Merton’s The Seven Storey Mountain (are we sensing a theme?). Since last week, I’ve been delving into the book and allowing myself to experience silence, however awkward (like, do you know how many noises your body makes?), and stillness, however uncomfortable (I really need to do more yoga). Too long I’ve been “scared” to hear what God has to say and what my own soul has to say. But A’s right – scared’s not a real thing, it’s something we imagine and create and build up to keep ourselves boxed in comfort and ego. Scared’s not a real thing because God is Love and Truth and Justice and Mercy, and Love and Truth and Justice and Mercy have no fear; they just are. God just is. I should thank my tooth-free friend A for his profound insight, tell him he’s a wise dude, but I’m sure by the time I do, he’ll be more interested in serving me plastic eggs and toast as the preschool “restaurant” than talking about fear.

Kate B. is a long-term CAP Volunteer in Child and Family Development. She is a member of the McCreary Volunteer Community.